The Weight of a Vasectomy: Honouring Men’s Silent Grief Through Jewellery & Escaping the Taboo

Taboo: The Word That Keeps Us Caged

We live in a world obsessed with sex; yet terrified of anything truly intimate. We're surrounded by hypersexual imagery, empty innuendo, and surface-level provocation, but the moment someone makes a personal, lasting connection to their sexuality, people look away. A piece of jewellery containing semen isn’t just provocative - it’s scandalous. Not because it’s obscene, but because it dares to mean something.

This discomfort doesn't come from the material itself, but from what it represents: vulnerability, ownership, connection, and power. Things we are taught should never be openly displayed - especially not by men.

At Cum What May, we don’t cater to those who flinch at honesty. We create for the ones who understand that meaning isn’t always pretty, and that connection can be filthy, sacred, and unforgettable all at once. Jewellery should never be reduced to decoration. It should hold weight. Memory. Story. And yes - sometimes it should make you blush.

In a previous post, I touched on the power of semen inclusion jewellery as a way to honour connection, ownership, and intimacy. But for many, particularly men navigating the quiet aftermath of a vasectomy, the meaning runs even deeper. This piece dives further into that space — exploring how something so final can still be marked with reverence, grief, and the kind of closure most never speak about.

A custom semen inclusion bracelet, crafted using a client’s final post-vasectomy sample. Worn as a quiet symbol of closure, legacy, and the deeply personal weight of choice

The Weight of a Vasectomy

A vasectomy is often framed as a simple, straightforward choice. A quick outpatient procedure, a few jokes about frozen peas, and then life moves on. But beneath the surface, for many men, it carries a silent grief that no one thinks to acknowledge.

There’s no ritual for them. No ceremony, no reflection, no recognition of what’s ending. And yet for some, it marks a profound emotional shift - the quick and silent end of fertility, the finality of fatherhood, or the closing of a chapter that defined their sense of identity for years. It can stir feelings of loss, confusion, or guilt that linger long after the anaesthetic wears off. But those feelings are rarely spoken aloud.

Because masculinity, as the world expects it, doesn't make space for mourning. Men are expected to carry on. To swallow any emotion and reduce the experience to a punchline. And so, most do - until it starts to unravel somewhere quieter, when no one is looking. We’ve had clients come to us with their final sample; not out of vanity or kink, but because they needed something to ground the gravity of what had just happened. For some, it's about honouring the family they’ve created - a keepsake of the part of them that built it. For others, it's a way of acknowledging the part of themselves that is now forever changed.

Turning that final release into jewellery becomes more than a creative act. It becomes a ritual of closure. A choice to preserve not just a substance, but a moment in time that mattered; even if no one else ever acknowledged it. Breastmilk jewellery is, for the most part so widely accepted. This holds the exact same meaning for a man; and yet this is something that people consider a taboo. Cum What May seeks to end that.

A bespoke semen inclusion ring, handcrafted using a client’s final post-vasectomy sample. This powerful piece marks the closing of a chapter — a raw, intimate reminder of legacy, connection, and choice

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A Symbol of Connection

Most keepsakes hold memory - but semen holds memory, identity, creation, and vulnerability, all at once! There is no part of you more exposed, more intimate, more revealing than this. It carries the potential to create life, to forge bonds, to claim, to surrender, to mark territory or devotion. It is, by its nature, deeply human.

When preserved in jewellery, it becomes something very few are ever brave enough to wear; a symbol of trust, of connection, and often of silent power. Some pieces represent pleasure. Others, ownership. For many, it’s about remembering a lover, a moment and a bond that changed them.

And for those who understand the weight of it, nothing else could ever compare.

Jewellery That Speaks Without Permission

Semen jewellery will never be mainstream. It was never meant to be. It exists in a space few dare to step into - where vulnerability meets desire, and where what’s worn becomes part confession, part declaration.

Cum What May was created to honour that space. To take the parts of ourselves we’re told to hide and turn them into art. Each piece is made with intent. Whether it’s a final goodbye after a vasectomy, a mark of dominance, a token of long-distance devotion, or a quiet act of remembrance, every inclusion tells a story.

This isn’t about shock. It’s about honesty. It’s about meaning - real, unfiltered, and deeply personal.

Because when you strip away the taboo, what’s left is something unforgettable.

A custom-made semen inclusion wedding band, handcrafted to sit beneath her engagement ring — quietly holding a moment the two of them shared, always. Proof that love, devotion, and desire can live side by side.